Monday, November 21, 2005

Even More Ways to Go

Mike came up with a doozy of a list this time, eh? Gotta love that dark sense of humor. As I wouldn't want anyone to think I'm not into dark humor, I have a few "ways to die" I'd like to add to the list.

The Top Ten Worst Ways to Die in Fantasy and Science Fiction

10) Having a witch, mad with the power of Chaos magic, wish you into non-existence.*

9) Being eaten by a Rancor.

8) Activating a radio to God and having your face melted off.

7) Pickled by toxic waste, your entire body splats on the windshield of a fast moving vehicle.

6) You survive several years as the Chief Engineer on a starship, only to have your life snuffed out in the lamest. series. finale. ever.

5) A bug in your brain, a phaser in your hand. Do the math.

4) Finally free of your human captors, your internal battery runs out of power. Time to die.

3) Called into existence as a sperm whale, your first few moments of life include striking the ground at terminal velocity.

2) Standing in the gateway to Hell, your soul finally restored to your body, your girlfriend slides a sword into your belly.

1) Seconds away from destroying the Rebel Alliance forever, it dawns on you that you forgot to close the thermal exhaust port.

*Not only is this a terrible way to die, it's even worse when the execution is lame, lame, lame.

7 comments:

Michael said...

Egad! How could I have forgoten the sperm whale?

Michael said...

And for #9, how about "learning a new meaning of pain and sufferingas you are slowly digested over a thousand years"?

dilliwag said...

How on earth did I forget about the great and almighty sarlaac?

dilliwag said...

10--Scarlet Witch gives Hawkeye the shaft.

4--Roy Batty. Blade Runner.

2--Buffy sends Angel to Hell.

dilliwag said...

Sure, Blade Runner takes some major liberties with the original literary piece. That said, the film remains one of my favorites. Would you believe I like the Director's Cut even more than the theatrical release?

Michael said...

What I enjoyed mopst about Blade Runner was the music. In fact, I was really introduced to the film by a Vangelis collection that included the end credits.

Your Host said...

Hooray! I love these and so did Michael.

My Michael, not Michael of the Army.