X3: Let's Hope This is Really the Last Stand

While I generally agree with the majority of Michael's sentiments about X3, my final grade comes in a bit lower: C-. As Michael suggested, the movie was entertaining summer blockbuster fare. However, I couldn't get past some of the significant changes to X-canon. My inner geek wouldn't stop saying, "That's not how it's supposed to happen." The changes in X1 & X2, all handled much more deftly, didn't set off the geek red alert; the klaxon blared all the way through X3. Here are a few of the changes that REALLY irritated me.

First, how many freakin X-plotlines do writers need to mash together? Do we really need to see the Dark Phoenix Saga, the Mutant Massacre, the mutant cure, Days of Future Past, and I don't know how many freakin other plots rolled into one movie? Smashing all these plots stuck in my craw more than anything else. The Dark Phoenix Saga is one of my favorite comic book stories of all time. This movie totally blew it. Jean kills Scott seconds after her rebirth? WTF? The final moment between Scott and Jean in Uncanny Xmen 137 is one of the only times I've shed a tear while reading a comic. Pathetic execution. Don't even get me started on the death of Professor X. What was the point with that scene?

Second, why was there NO mention of the Phoenix Force whatsoever? Dark Phoenix was not Darth Jean; Dark Phoenix was an interstellar cosmic lifeforce doppelganger of Jean Grey pushed to the brink of insanity by the villanous mutant, Mastermind (part of the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants and the Hellfire Club, I believe). Jean's psychic imprint, fused with the Phoenix Force, battled the cosmic entity for control of the doppelganger.* Why couldn't this have been the main focus of this film? Call me a comic book geek, but I think this version of the Dark Phoenix story would have been far more compelling than the crapfest showing on the big screen. Tweak the plot a bit, have Jean using her newfound powers in some ethically questionable ways (do the ends justify the means kind of thing), a clash or two with Magneto & the Brotherhood, the X-men are ultimately forced to confront Jean (a battle with Xavier in the psionic realm, a physical confrontation with the others, etc). Scott lives, Xavier lives, and all the X-men must deal with Jean's eventual suicide (sorry if I spoiled the basic plot to Uncanny X-men 137). This could have been a beautiful film about ethics, the means by which we should address hatred, self-sacrifice, etc. Instead, we get multiple personality Jean joining forces with Magneto and the Brotherhood of Whimpy Mutants. A similar rewrite of the Mutant Massacre plotline could also result in an engaging film. Pick one plot and develop it, please. I like stories and characters with depth.

Third, the lameness that was the Juggernaut: "I'm the Juggernaut, bitch?" Dave Chappel does the X-men? Ugh. Juggernaut's powers were the result of magic, not the mutant x-gene. Save him for a future movie or don't use him at all. While I liked the race between Kitty and Juggernaut, I couldn't stand the way she stopped him.

Fourth, have I mentioned the lame demise of Cyclops? How about Professor X? Senseless. Senseless. Senseless. When characters die just to enhance the threat factor of the big bad, you have a case of bad writing (or two cases of bad writing). Deaths should be meaningful, not meaningless.

Fifth, what was with the combined Callisto/Caliban/Quicksilver character?

I could go on and on with the little things about this film that irked me (how about that lame Sentinal sequence, eh?), but I'll stop here. Although I disliked all the unecessary deviations from canon, the film was an entertaining way to spend a Wednesday afternoon.

*At the time, none of us knew the reborn Jean Grey was a duplicate. We all assumed the Phoenix Force possessed Jean's orginal body.