Okay, I finally got around to offering my picks for the best of the baddies.
Movies
Best Villain. Flash Gordon's arch-nemesis, Ming the Merciless. The guy watched his own daughter being tortured with bore worms. ick.
Best Villain Group. The Kryptonian criminals from Superman II: Ursa, Non, and General "Kneel Before Me" Zod.
Best Villain Organization. The Galactic Empire. This organization demands subservience by all it's members. Act up a bit and you'll find your planet blown to smithereens.
Television
Best Villain. Lionel Luther from Smallville. What a magnificent bastard.
Best Villain Group. The Legion of Doom. I loved them on the old Superfriends show. The good news is that The Legion of Doom is being resurrected for Justice League Unlimited. w00t.
Best Villain Organization. The new Cylons. Ruthless, relentless, and devious. Their ability to infiltrate the Fleet in the guise of humans adds a new level of tension to the retelling of the Galactic narrative.
Print
Best Villain. I've always been rather fond of Ultron. Virtually indestructable, he keeps going, and going, and going. What version of Ultron are we on now, 10?
Best Villain Group. The Brotherhood of Evil Mutants. Not the original Magneto, Toad, Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch group, but the Mystique, Destiny, Pyro, Avalanche, Blob, Rogue incarnation of the 1980s. While talking a few nights back, Mike and I recalled the way in which the Brotherhood slammed Colussus. Pyro heated his organic osmium skin to white hot temperatures and Avalanche smashed him with a tanker full of liquid nitrogen. Ouch.
Best Villain Organization. Advanced Ideas Mechanics. They created Modok, for crying out loud!
RPG
Best Villain. Mike's Juggernaut clone, Earthmover. I hated that guy.
Best Villain Group. Power Syndicate - Fastback, Hummel, Chuck and Airstrike. Like Mike and Curtis before me, this group proved to be a major pain.
Best Villain Organization. Genocide. The mutant hating organization still makes my blood pressure rise.
Friday, July 29, 2005
Friday, July 22, 2005
Why I Read What I Read
This quote comes comliments of Curtis:
"When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty, I read them openly. When I became a man, I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up."
-C.S. Lewis
"When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty, I read them openly. When I became a man, I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up."
-C.S. Lewis
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
Black Hats
Okay, here's another one of these reader-participation posts of which I am so fond. I invite not only my fellow collaborators to participate, but also any guest(s) that may stumble upon it.
Today's topic is villains. That's right, the bad guys. The enemy. The blokes in the black hats. And I'd like to hear who your favorites are.
Here's the recommended format: please provide your nominee for Best Villain (individual), Best Villain Group (small group), and Best Villainous Organization (large group). And to make it interesting, please provide nominees in each of the following four categories: Movies, Television, Print (i.e., books or comics), and Roleplaying (personal experience, if applicable).
As with previous discussions of this ilk, please give details. I look forward to what you have to say. I'm going to break tradition this time, however, and post my answers first.
Movies
Best Villain: Darth Vader
Vader gets the nod for sheer presence. Just having him around creates terror not only in his enemies, but also in his underlings. Two minutes of screen time is all it takes to know that Vader is someone not to be screwed with.
Best Villain Group: The crew of the Black Pearl(Pirates of the Caribbean)
Although they're not the brightest bunch, they're greedy, singleminded, vicious, and in general just plain nasty. And then you find out that they're also undead.
Best Villainous Organization: Nazis
The original Stormtroopers. Whether they're chasing Indiana Jones or trying to keep Allied POWs from making a Great Escape, you can't help but love to see them fail. Indy said it best: "Nazis. I hate these guys."
Television
Best Villain: Alfred Bester (Babylon 5)
He's arrogant, devious, smug, ruthless, and unfortunately, just about untouchable. You just want to smack him on sight. He's no Pavel Chekov, that's for sure.
Best Villain Group: The Hive: Brother Blood, Gizmo, Jinx, Mammoth, et. al. (Teen Titans)
It's not just that they're villains...they're also teenagers.
Best Villainous Organization: The Borg
Although their villainy was diluted quite as bit by Voyager, make no mistake. These folks are not someone you want to meet in a dark nebula. You can't negotiate with them, you can't drive them off, and you can't hold them back. You can only hope to destroy them - before they do the same to you.
Print
Best Villain: Magneto
It's not just that Magneto is obnoxiously powerful, although he certainly is that. What makes him truly dangerous that he's suave and sophisticated, and extremely persuasive. His arguments are almost enough to make you wonder if he really is the bad guy. Almost.
Best Villain Group: Slytherin House (Harry Potter)
Draco Malfoy tries to put himself across as brave and smart, but by the end of the first book you've learned that he's basically just a bully like his two lapdogs, Crabbe and Goyle. And as the series goes on, you come to find out that the rest of the house is no better. Nasty buggers, the lot of them, and racists to boot.
Best Villainous Organization: The Imperial Order (Terry Goodkind's "Sword of Truth" series)
Violent, bloodthirsty, and rapacious, Emperor Jagang's army sweeps across whole kingdoms killing, looting, despoiling, and decimating anything and anyone in their path. But what makes them truly frightening is how much they enjoy it, relish it, savor it. They believe that they're fully justified in doing all of this, that their enemies ultimately deserve this treatment. It might not be so scary if there weren't so much of that sort of thing going on in the real world.
Roleplaying
Best Villain: Iconoclast
Derek threw this 100-foot monstrosity up against us one day, and we beat on him for most of a very long evening before we put him down. It was nasty. But even worse was that every so often, if we complained about a scenario, he'd say, "Or we could fight Iconoclast again...."
Best Villain Group: Fastback, Hummel, and 'Chuk
A SPD- and DEX-draining speedster, an armored brick, and a martial arts master, respectively. This team was Lawrence's master stroke of villainy. We'd cringe every time we saw them.
Best Villainous Organization: Tarot
This is Curtis' signature villain group with ~30 members plus agents and support staff. We hated fighting them because a) there were always a ton of them around and b) you could never tell exactly who would show up - or what they could do. One of my favorite role-playing experiences was when one of my characters underwent plastic and psychic surgery and infiltrated the group.
That's my contribution. Happy posting!
Today's topic is villains. That's right, the bad guys. The enemy. The blokes in the black hats. And I'd like to hear who your favorites are.
Here's the recommended format: please provide your nominee for Best Villain (individual), Best Villain Group (small group), and Best Villainous Organization (large group). And to make it interesting, please provide nominees in each of the following four categories: Movies, Television, Print (i.e., books or comics), and Roleplaying (personal experience, if applicable).
As with previous discussions of this ilk, please give details. I look forward to what you have to say. I'm going to break tradition this time, however, and post my answers first.
Movies
Best Villain: Darth Vader
Vader gets the nod for sheer presence. Just having him around creates terror not only in his enemies, but also in his underlings. Two minutes of screen time is all it takes to know that Vader is someone not to be screwed with.
Best Villain Group: The crew of the Black Pearl(Pirates of the Caribbean)
Although they're not the brightest bunch, they're greedy, singleminded, vicious, and in general just plain nasty. And then you find out that they're also undead.
Best Villainous Organization: Nazis
The original Stormtroopers. Whether they're chasing Indiana Jones or trying to keep Allied POWs from making a Great Escape, you can't help but love to see them fail. Indy said it best: "Nazis. I hate these guys."
Television
Best Villain: Alfred Bester (Babylon 5)
He's arrogant, devious, smug, ruthless, and unfortunately, just about untouchable. You just want to smack him on sight. He's no Pavel Chekov, that's for sure.
Best Villain Group: The Hive: Brother Blood, Gizmo, Jinx, Mammoth, et. al. (Teen Titans)
It's not just that they're villains...they're also teenagers.
Best Villainous Organization: The Borg
Although their villainy was diluted quite as bit by Voyager, make no mistake. These folks are not someone you want to meet in a dark nebula. You can't negotiate with them, you can't drive them off, and you can't hold them back. You can only hope to destroy them - before they do the same to you.
Best Villain: Magneto
It's not just that Magneto is obnoxiously powerful, although he certainly is that. What makes him truly dangerous that he's suave and sophisticated, and extremely persuasive. His arguments are almost enough to make you wonder if he really is the bad guy. Almost.
Best Villain Group: Slytherin House (Harry Potter)
Draco Malfoy tries to put himself across as brave and smart, but by the end of the first book you've learned that he's basically just a bully like his two lapdogs, Crabbe and Goyle. And as the series goes on, you come to find out that the rest of the house is no better. Nasty buggers, the lot of them, and racists to boot.
Best Villainous Organization: The Imperial Order (Terry Goodkind's "Sword of Truth" series)
Violent, bloodthirsty, and rapacious, Emperor Jagang's army sweeps across whole kingdoms killing, looting, despoiling, and decimating anything and anyone in their path. But what makes them truly frightening is how much they enjoy it, relish it, savor it. They believe that they're fully justified in doing all of this, that their enemies ultimately deserve this treatment. It might not be so scary if there weren't so much of that sort of thing going on in the real world.
Roleplaying
Best Villain: Iconoclast
Derek threw this 100-foot monstrosity up against us one day, and we beat on him for most of a very long evening before we put him down. It was nasty. But even worse was that every so often, if we complained about a scenario, he'd say, "Or we could fight Iconoclast again...."
Best Villain Group: Fastback, Hummel, and 'Chuk
A SPD- and DEX-draining speedster, an armored brick, and a martial arts master, respectively. This team was Lawrence's master stroke of villainy. We'd cringe every time we saw them.
Best Villainous Organization: Tarot
This is Curtis' signature villain group with ~30 members plus agents and support staff. We hated fighting them because a) there were always a ton of them around and b) you could never tell exactly who would show up - or what they could do. One of my favorite role-playing experiences was when one of my characters underwent plastic and psychic surgery and infiltrated the group.
That's my contribution. Happy posting!
Tuesday, July 12, 2005
Movie Quotes
The American Film Institute recently released its list of the 100 Greatest Movie Quotes of All Time. I thought the fantasy and science fiction genres were quite underrepresented on the list, so I've put together one of my own. Enjoy.
Yoda: Remember, a Jedi's strength flows from the Force. But beware. Anger, fear, aggression. The dark side are they. Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny. (Return of the Jedi)
Han Solo: Afraid I was gonna leave without giving you a goodbye kiss?
Princess Leia: I'd just as soon kiss a Wookie.
Han Solo: I can arrange that! (The Empire Strikes Back)
Yoda: No. Try not. Do...or do not. There is no try. (The Empire Strikes Back)
Everyone: I have a bad feeling about this.... (Star Wars I-VI)
Indiana: I don't know, I'm making this up as I go. (Raiders of the Lost Ark)
Professor Henry Jones: Well, I'm as human as the next man.
Indiana Jones: Dad, I *was* the next man. (Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade)
Alex Rogan: So...how many Starfighters are left?
Grig: Including you? One. (The Last Starfighter)
Gaff: It's too bad she won't live! But then again, who does? (Blade Runner)
Roy Batty: I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. (Blade Runner)
Ash: All right, you primitive screwheads, listen up! (Army of Darkness)
Jack Burton: Hey, I'm a reasonable guy. But I've just experienced some very unreasonable things. (Big Trouble in Little China)
Jack Burton: Now I'm not saying that I've been everywhere and I've done everything, but I do know it's a pretty amazing planet we live on, and a man would have to be some kind of FOOL to think we're alone in THIS universe. (Big Trouble in Little China)
Dr. Gillian Taylor: Don't tell me, you're from outer space.
Kirk: No, I'm from Iowa. I only work in outer space. (Star Trek IV)
Fred Kwan: That was a hell of a thing. (Galaxy Quest)
Jack Sparrow: Anamaria.
[Anamaria slaps Jack]
Will Turner: I suppose, you didn't deserve that one either?
Jack Sparrow: No, that one I deserved. (Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl)
Edna: No capes! (The Incredibles)
Julius Levinson: All you need is love. John Lennon said that. Smart man, shot in the back. Very sad. (Independence Day)
The Shoveller: We've got a blind date with Destiny - and it looks like she's ordered the lobster. (Mystery Men)
The Sphinx: You must lash out with every limb, like the octopus who plays the drums. (Mystery Men)
The Invisible Man: Well, hello to you, too. And need I remind you, I am naked in the snow. I can't feel any of my extremities. And I mean...any of them. (The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen)
Wolverine: You actually go outside in these things?
Cyclops: Well, what would you prefer? Yellow spandex? (X-Men)
Wolverine: You're so full of $#!%. If you were really so righteous, it'd be you up in that thing, not her. (X-Men)
Professor X: My tolerance for your smoking in the mansion notwithstanding, if you continue to smoke in here, you'll spend the rest of your life believing you are a six year old girl.
Wolverine: You can do that?
Professor X: I'd have Jean braid your hair. (X2)
Bruce Banner: But you know what scares me the most? When I can't fight it anymore, when it takes over, when I totally lose control...I like it. (Hulk)
Dumbledore: It does not do to dwell on dreams, Harry, and forget to live. (Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone)
Dumbledore: And finally, I must tell you that this year, the third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a most painful death. (Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone)
Esteban: A little clumsy, are you not, my friend?
Zorro: To be your friend I would have to be more than clumsy. I would have to be stupid. (Zorro, the Gay Blade)
Westley: This is true love - you think this happens every day? (The Princess Bride)
Westley: Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while. (The Princess Bride)
Yoda: Remember, a Jedi's strength flows from the Force. But beware. Anger, fear, aggression. The dark side are they. Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny. (Return of the Jedi)
Han Solo: Afraid I was gonna leave without giving you a goodbye kiss?
Princess Leia: I'd just as soon kiss a Wookie.
Han Solo: I can arrange that! (The Empire Strikes Back)
Yoda: No. Try not. Do...or do not. There is no try. (The Empire Strikes Back)
Everyone: I have a bad feeling about this.... (Star Wars I-VI)
Indiana: I don't know, I'm making this up as I go. (Raiders of the Lost Ark)
Professor Henry Jones: Well, I'm as human as the next man.
Indiana Jones: Dad, I *was* the next man. (Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade)
Alex Rogan: So...how many Starfighters are left?
Grig: Including you? One. (The Last Starfighter)
Gaff: It's too bad she won't live! But then again, who does? (Blade Runner)
Roy Batty: I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. (Blade Runner)
Ash: All right, you primitive screwheads, listen up! (Army of Darkness)
Jack Burton: Hey, I'm a reasonable guy. But I've just experienced some very unreasonable things. (Big Trouble in Little China)
Jack Burton: Now I'm not saying that I've been everywhere and I've done everything, but I do know it's a pretty amazing planet we live on, and a man would have to be some kind of FOOL to think we're alone in THIS universe. (Big Trouble in Little China)
Dr. Gillian Taylor: Don't tell me, you're from outer space.
Kirk: No, I'm from Iowa. I only work in outer space. (Star Trek IV)
Fred Kwan: That was a hell of a thing. (Galaxy Quest)
Jack Sparrow: Anamaria.
[Anamaria slaps Jack]
Will Turner: I suppose, you didn't deserve that one either?
Jack Sparrow: No, that one I deserved. (Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl)
Edna: No capes! (The Incredibles)
Julius Levinson: All you need is love. John Lennon said that. Smart man, shot in the back. Very sad. (Independence Day)
The Shoveller: We've got a blind date with Destiny - and it looks like she's ordered the lobster. (Mystery Men)
The Sphinx: You must lash out with every limb, like the octopus who plays the drums. (Mystery Men)
The Invisible Man: Well, hello to you, too. And need I remind you, I am naked in the snow. I can't feel any of my extremities. And I mean...any of them. (The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen)
Wolverine: You actually go outside in these things?
Cyclops: Well, what would you prefer? Yellow spandex? (X-Men)
Wolverine: You're so full of $#!%. If you were really so righteous, it'd be you up in that thing, not her. (X-Men)
Professor X: My tolerance for your smoking in the mansion notwithstanding, if you continue to smoke in here, you'll spend the rest of your life believing you are a six year old girl.
Wolverine: You can do that?
Professor X: I'd have Jean braid your hair. (X2)
Bruce Banner: But you know what scares me the most? When I can't fight it anymore, when it takes over, when I totally lose control...I like it. (Hulk)
Dumbledore: It does not do to dwell on dreams, Harry, and forget to live. (Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone)
Dumbledore: And finally, I must tell you that this year, the third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a most painful death. (Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone)
Esteban: A little clumsy, are you not, my friend?
Zorro: To be your friend I would have to be more than clumsy. I would have to be stupid. (Zorro, the Gay Blade)
Westley: This is true love - you think this happens every day? (The Princess Bride)
Westley: Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while. (The Princess Bride)
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